The Problem with General Hospital- It’s the Women, Stupid!!

I saw the ratings for GH today and all I can say is “Nice work, Nimnuts”. 

You’re tanking this show.  I suppose it’s not their fault.  They were handed a sinking ship and all they’ve done is throw out life preservers to those who are trying desperately to be saved, only to find that they are riddled with leaks.  They can’t hold air and everyone’s going down……….and not in the good way.

I thought it would be amusing to me, but it’s not. As with the other losers left on this pathetic “network”, GH is sinking fast and shouldn’t be around much longer.  I thought my bitterness would override my empathy, and, surprisingly, it did!  But, I find I’m more depressed than ever.  Again, what was it all about?  Why did it happen?  I just feel as if it’s all some cruel joke- an artform wiped out by commerce.  That’s nothing new.  Yet this time, it’s so much more painful.

I know my “schpiel” is to rant and rave and swear.  But I can’t do that today. I’m overwhelmed by thoughts of Viki speaking on the importance of the soap opera.  And how that’s all over now.  GH doesn’t count as a soap opera anymore, IMO.  It’s not about family and love and reconciliation and remorse and pain and grief, and most importantly, redemption and forgiveness. It’s not about complex relationships based on years of working through issues and devotion to making it work, even when it seems hopeless.  It’s about darkness and violence.  Hell, "The Sopranos" had more heart than GH.  And it was more amusing, as well. And lighter. 

OLTL, and even AMC until its recent years, were traditional soap operas.  GH was once, but they lost their way in a morass of egos and contrived plotlines that strayed from the formula.  As many have been saying, they are a show about men when soaps are all about women, and the men they love.  

Look at AMC- the face of the show was Erica.  I was not a fan of the character, but it was a show about women. There was the Brooke/Erica rivalry, the focus on the Kane women, and the dismal- but female- Greenlee.  Angie Hubbard was strong, brave, intelligent, and very, very female.  The show lost its way, IMO, when they focused on Ryan.  What they didn’t realize is that he was only palatable with his love for Gillian- again, a woman. He was more endearing in her last thirty second cameo than he’d been in a decade.

Adam and David were always motivated by their love for women and their devotion to them.  Two of the greatest male characters ever, IMO, and they were often dark and complex, but they were about seeking love and understanding, in their own way, of course! Focusing on the pathetic and weak JR and the more pathetic and weak Carey broads was the death knell.  They were one dimensional and vapid and took the once great Martins down with them- with only Jake standing with- whodathunkit- Crazy Janet’s baby girl, Amanda.  Another bright female light.

OLTL was always Viki’s show.  She and Dorian anchored the show and their relationship gave it depth and a history.  Jess and Natalie, the Kramer women, even Carlotta, all gave the show its focus on family and the relevance of the matriarchal order in this form.  And how can we forget Nora, the often strong yet flawed woman who could stand up to the strong Buchanan men- any of them.  On OLTL, men were only important in what they brought out in the women.  There was an attempt to shift this with the addition of McBain, but even he was often part of a woman-centered story.  I thought Marty and Natalie’s relationship was always more interesting than anything that happened with John!  

As I’ve said endlessly, Todd is only viable due to his relationships with the women in his life.  They are the true champions of his story.  In reality, I see him much as prop to them.  His life only made Blair, Starr, and Viki more interesting and sympathetic.  Tea, well, not so much.  Although I liked how she shunned him at the end, realizing he had done nothing but abuse her.  That was a nice touch.  She finally came into her own in that way, finding her strength in separating from her victim mentality- when it came to that Todd, anyway.

GH has none of that as I can see.  The women are mostly disgusting, weak, or marginalized. Carly has sickened me since she slept with the wonderful Tony and ruined him in my eyes.  I see she hasn’t improved since.  Truly a despicable character with no redeeming qualities.  I see there’s Alexis, who might have some potential if she weren’t so dull.  Sam? Well, no, just no.  Strength is not what I’m seeing.  She’s an aging sex kitten who better do her centerfold soon, as the clock’s a ticking.  If she hasn’t done it already….

The other women are crazy or annoying with bad accents and no substance. I hear this Elizabeth may be interesting but she sounds like Marty without the backbone.  Thanks, but no thanks.  I’ve had my fill of rape victim stories.  OLTL did it best.

There is no more Laura or Bobbie or Felicia or Tiffany or the wonderful Leslie to play foil to Monica.  The Quartermaines are gutted and the only hope for the light that once was this show is gone with them.  Expecting Twiddle Dee and Tweedle Dum to resurrect them is ridiculous.  They’ll probably have Todd buy the mansion and move in that goddamn parrot instead of his wife and family and have some screeching harpy railing at him all the time.  Ah yes, OLTL resurrected as its worst self. That sounds like these idiots.

The once great Tracey seems fine but is marginalized into the “older woman” role that makes her almost a joke.  This happened at the end of Dorian’s run on OLTL and I resented it then and resent it now as Tracey is one of the only faces I recognize from the old days.  But, maybe that’s the problem.  Besides Anna, who I hear comes in and out, and Robin, who is now “dead”, the old female faces are gone- replaced by the surly Sonny, the bland Jason, and the once interesting now pathetic Luke.  I’ve never seen so many people standing around looking old and bored and uninterested in what they’re doing.  And I teach college. I know uninterested faces when I see them. How nice.  A dark show about dull, dark men.  That’s not a soap opera. It’s a bad action film with no action.

Unlike Todd, David, and Adam, these three are not complex or motivated by love, no matter how twisted that may be.  Yes, those three sought power and control, but they did so, misguidedly, for love.  These GH guys, well, I don’t know what guides them, but I don’t care.  I know I don’t see love. I don’t see vulnerability.  I see nothing, really.  They, like many of the women I’ve seen, are vapid and one dimensional, played by mediocre actors.  I know Geary was great once, but I don’t see it now.  Maybe he stopped trying. Maybe he’s as bored and depressed as the show seems to be.  I know watching it made me bored and depressed.

It’s sad.  Too sad to even continue. Why this show?  Why is it the last “man” standing ? It seems to be  the one who will bring down the form on ABC?  Why?  Maybe because men are running it.  But, I think, they always were.  It’s a shame, really, as there’s so much left to mine from what’s been left behind.  

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again, “Build it and they will come”.  That’s from a movie about men, but, really it’s a chick flick in the important ways. It’s about love and family and hope and forgiveness and a second chance.  Too bad we won’t get one.  There was still so much to be saved.  But, alas, no one to build it. So many of us are left with nowhere to go.

God, I miss Viki today.