ABC's Failure Continues- But So Does the Arrogance

Marc Berman of Media Insights is quickly becoming my favorite person on the face of the Earth. I love him, really, almost as much as I love Viki and Todd. We're not talking David Hayward levels of love here, but, come on, that's a once in a TV lifetime thing, right? But I love him because he told me this:

The news was not positive in week two for Good Afternoon America on ABC. Based on the Live Plus Same Day ratings from Nielsen for the week of July 16, GAA was close to modest first week levels. It finished fourth among the quartet of network daytime talkers in three of the four surveyed categories (excluding women 18-34), and dropped from year-ago occupant One Life to Live by 36 percent in total viewers and demographically by as much as 48 percent among women 18-49. While this was an improvement from recent occupant The Revolution, it is still a major disappointment. And there is no reason to believe it will last past the initial nine-week order. 

The moral of this week’s story: some shows are a better fit in the AM than the PM

http://www.tvmediainsights.com/

I wish I could invite all of you to my wedding to Mr. Berman at Congregation Solel this Fall, but we have limited seating available.  You'll understand.


Best........News.............Ever.  Again, not because I particularly care that GH will probably survive but because it proves me right. And I hate that!! Those asswipes should be feeling the pain and the humiliation of their boneheaded move to arrogantly kill a genre to save a buck. Good work, Douchebags. Destroy a form of narrative programming and cultural expression for your bottom line. Nice to see it's coming back to bite you in the ass- not once, but twice. And I predict this will happen again and again and again.  This calamity seems to be the gift that keeps on giving and it's making me giddy as an obnoxious schoolgirl who can now look at you on many occasions saying "Neener, neener, neener" and do my superiority dance in your face.

Okay, I know that's not featuring the Superiority Dance, but it's in there at the end. And it's SO appropriate!!

As I've said before, bite me, ABC, as I may come here and rant like a sonofbitch as it amuses me, but I do have a lot of diplomas on my wall from institutions that aren't exactly lacking in terms of prestige in this area. I would never talk like this professionally but if it's anonymous, why not be outrageous and have some fun, huh? I TOLD YOU SO, YOU MORONS!!!! What part of "I've studied this audience for twenty years" didn't you get?????????

I hate idiots.

Especially ones that are well paid and rewarded for their incompetence. Anyone hear that Jill Farren Phelps will spearheading the trainwreck formerly known as Y&R in the near future? That's a good move....only not.  Guess the Bells and Sony need more misogyny and ageism and red ink on the books.  Good job, Sony!!!But, I digress. And, really, I don't care enough about Y&R to rant about it. But kudos to Doug Davidson who's been spectacular and the always brilliant Ms. Stafford. Too bad they'll be too old for their new EP to use in the near future. I predict it will become the Abby and Carmine Hour soon. Stay tuned!

Back to my dear friends at ABC because they just can't get enough of my attention. Paul Lee, President of the Brain Trust known as ABC "Entertainment", claims they have no intention of reviving their former daytime scripted dramas that now look as if they were blockbusters when compared to this crap.  However, when discussing their current state of "mind",. he said, "Our focus is on GENERAL HOSPITAL, and I think Frank [Valentini] is doing a great job with that, and a lot of his crossovers. So we like that and are great supporters of it."

So, when discussing the plan of action to slow or stop their current descent into obscurity, he thinks they should focus on what's left. But I left out the most important part of his quote. Before he reiterated his "dedication" to GH, he said this about the move to yank the really successful one:

"I think those decisions were made".

HM.  That's a giant shot in the arm to the Rhodes Scholar who made that dumbass decision, isn't it? It screams "We were right and you all were wrong", don't you hear that? You think those decisions were made?  No kidding, Einstein.  We know that. Now, be a good boy and admit your mistake. I admit that I was wrong when I thought Todd would have sex with Blair last week. I admit it. Now you admit that you fucked up!!! Admit it. Maybe then we all won't hate you.

Look, Paul, and I'm calling you Paul as I feel no need to address you formally. I'm not fond of you and I feel no need to give you that respect. I also, obviously, feel as if I know more than you. That's not because I have a lot of little letters after my name but because I listen to viewers and watch television shows. It's pretty easy. You should try it some time.

So, anyway, Paul, admit you made a mistake. We're a forgiving bunch. We're resilient. Ask Valentini. Now, admit your mistake and just write a big ass check and bring it all back in some form. I suppose it could be argued that's what you're doing. But I don't see it yet and if I don't see it soon, I'll go away along with about a million of my close, personal friends. Now, listen to Elvis. He knows all and is  the key to getting some respect!!!

Did you listen to Elvis? He is the Master of the Universe. Get the meaning?  "It was a fine idea at the time....Now it's a brilliant mistake".  God, I love Elvis!!! And, BTW, that's Summerfest in Milwaukee. I think I was at that show. But, if you've ever been to Summerfest, no one remembers much from their time there.......Some stereotypes are true. I've also seen Elvis so many times, I can't keep them straight.

Now, it's this part of the above quote that stood out to me more than the rest and why I'm addressing Paul as such and not something more creative like Weaselfuck or Lizard Lips.

 "Frank [Valentini] is doing a great job with that, and a lot of his crossovers. So we like that and are great supporters of it."

What does that mean, Paul? Does that mean you think FV is doing well with the rank loser known as GH or that you like his crossovers? Why mention crossovers and not simply talk about GH doing well? Are you attributing your praise to those crossovers? I think you are and that shows that you may wander in the world of the idiots, but may not actually be a complete idiot yourself. We know that complete idiots are rare, so that is within the realm of possibility.

OMG, what a goddamn clusterfuck that place is at this point. Really. What a bunch of incompetent losers. I can't...not even. It's too much. But, I'll hang my little hat of hope on this little comment that may mean something and may mean nothing. Desperate times call for desperate measures, so, as usual, the OLTL/AMC fan sits and waits. I'm holding my breath to see my boyfriend Clint in the form of the luscious JVD go after John, the cheating fink. I'm biding my time until I can see Viki scold Todd for, well, everything. And I'm patiently awaiting the next arrival of Blair and it better be for good this time. I'm yawning the minute she leaves, even though Todd is infinitely amusing. he can't carry all those losers on his back.

And I'm making one new plea for Bo and Nora. Let them go after Todd for baby switching when he's in Llanview, making Tea go away and bedding Blair. That would be so great. I know it's out of their jurisdiction, I went to law school. But, I don't care!! How did Johnny know the truth about Todd? Who cares? It's a frickin' soap opera. Just make it happen!! I miss them.

Meanwhile, down on the farm, there's good things happening elsewhere.  Tim Gunn has landed comfortably back at Project Runway on Lifetime and he couldn't look happier. I couldn't be happier to see him.  Yeah Tim Gunn!! I love Tim Gunn and am so happy he's been released from Loserdom. He can take his rightful place as hippest dude in town!!

I think I'll ask Tim to give me away in my wedding to Marc Berman. I wonder if David Hayward will pull a patented Todd Manning Wedding Surprise? Now, that might be nice.Like Blair, I'd have to run away with him. He may be a lunatic but he's my lunatic......