The Sky Ain't Falling, Chicken Little: Stop the PP Panic!!

Okay, so I see everyone freaking out and I’m crazy busy but I feel the need jump into the fray and say this:

STOP SPAZZING!!STOP BEING CRAZY SOAP FANS AND LOSING YOUR SHIT AND THINKING THE WORLD IS ENDING!! It’s not.

Well, that’s not true. We all end up dead, so, in fact, the world is always ending. And I don’t even try to keep up with what’s going down in Syria or Libya, so it could be ending for reals for everyone. Dennis Rodman’s buddy is a huge headcase in North Korea. So, I’m wrong. There may be a reason to panic. But not about PP.

It’s true that they are cutting back from four episodes a week to two. That’s a decision that was made public yesterday. And, yes, I think that sucks as I wanted MORE shows rather than less. Yet, as we all know, we can’t always get what we want.

The rationale is interesting and has some merit. Allegedly, there aren’t enough people watching them daily. Those people who are watching more casually may be getting backlogged. This would lead to people being overwhelmed as they’d feel the need to “catch up”. This, in turn, won’t encourage them to jump in to the show. They’d feel as if they missed too much. That’s rational and I get it. I’m not sure it’s the real reason, but it isn’t silly or invalid reasoning. It makes sense.

But I’d assume there are other, more important reasons. Now, let me say this first and foremost. I DO NOT THINK THIS IS AN INDICATION OF THESE SHOWS NOT BEING SUCCESSFUL. Not even a little. I’ve read the numbers, watched their position on Hulu, and know that’s not the case. The reviews are fabulous, the fans are out of control happy, and the actors seem very pleased, as well. So, it’s not that. SO STOP WITH THE DOOMSDAY STUFF! There are other issues at hand.

What I think is really the opposite. I think these shows are too successful and the production plan can't handle it.

 I was always skeptical on the production schedule. How would it be possible for them to shoot for five weeks, be off for five, and then complete four 30 minute shows a week? That doesn’t seem possible. If you look at B&B, they shoot all year and have only five 30 minute shows. How can these guys pull that off, minus the day, in less than half the time? It seemed optimistic at best.

Then there was an interview with ES where she said they shot enough for twenty shows. It seemed strange and people were chatting about it but then dismissed it. If she was right, as she always is, she’s SLEZAK, then if they run them four days a week, they only had five weeks of shows. We’re done with three. There would only be two left………That’s not making sense. OLTL is just going back to work next week. How can they have enough shows shot NEXT week to be ready in three weeks?

I hope you see where I’m going here. Now, I swear, I know nothing. I’m just speculating and using some logic. I think this may be a little about the audience, sure, why not. But I think it’s something else completely. 

I think they don’t have enough shows. I think they produced a great product, left the audience clamoring for more, and now, they got nothing left. The shelves are empty.  What can they do? Easy- parcel them out more slowly and extend their supply until they can replenish. That makes sense to me. 

 

Now, that’s one scenario. There are others which make sense and don’t involve being cancelled. Here’s a few:

-They are working on a cable deal and need to slow up to be able to have the TV audience catch up with the shows already seen online. It’s being banded about that there is at least an international cable deal in the works. If that’s true, as they already have FX-Canada, then I’d bet there’s an American one being discussed, as well. That means that they’d have to play “catch up” with the audience on television. They’d have to run the shows we’ve seen online to keep the continuity. 

How do you do that without all the shows being out of sync? Easy- you cut the number on online shows now, so you can make it easier in September which is when the fall schedule begins. They would have half as many shows to rerun on television as there would be if you kept it to four. This is possible, not sure if it’s likely, but it’s possible.

-Next, there is the idea that they’re getting another show added to the repertoire soon. By this I mean the sad and pathetic GH. Unless ABC's Dummer- as in Dumber- has a serious food fetish, I can’t see this loser hanging on much longer. I’ve seen her picture. That food fetish is possible. Maybe she’s into condiments….who knows. But,  I digress. I can’t make enough jokes about that dog of a show. Hey, has Dieter asked anyone to touch his monkey yet? It’s coming. But I hear he doesn’t speak. Guess Howarth doesn’t want to learn lines, huh? He must hate Nimnut’s writing as much as  the audience. Or he's trying to memorize his lines for OLTL while he's "acting" on GH. He's multi-tasking.

I’m sorry. Again, I digress. I just can’t help myself. I have a fetish- mocking GH. But they deserve it.

So, at any rate, if GH is being cancelled at any minute, they’ll have a third show to deal with on this crazy schedule. That would be more pressure, more time, and more haggling. I could see that throwing a monkeywrench into the works.  OOOPPS- sorry, Dieter. Don't want to get you all excited.  Again, I apologize. I have Sprockets, I mean GH, on my mind. Has Beeker beeped yet? I can’t wait to see that. We know Easton loves the silly stuff. He’s doing his best Jerry Lewis imitation, I hear. I can't wait until he calls Monaco "Lady" in that shrill, annoying way. That should be comedy gold!

-Finally, it could be what they said. It could be that they’re getting fine numbers but, like all corporate types, they want those numbers to grow steadily. And they aren’t. They’re good enough but not showing the growth they’d like. That would mean that they need to try to ensure a steady rise, not stay with status quo. The scenario they describe would, in fact, possibly encourage that.

What is NOT happening is they're being cancelled. If these shows were being cancelled, why are they still being produced? Why do they have a schedule for August? Why are they trying to tweek something if they’re going to dump it? That makes no sense. If they want to dump it, they cut the costs. Cutting the costs of production has nothing to do with this scenario. They’re still shooting the same number of shows. They just are releasing them more slowly. If they were cancelling, that makes no sense.

So, yell, scream, cry, do whatever you want. But I’ll tell you one thing. It’s for naught. But, we’re soap opera fans. We love the drama. We love hanging from the high wire when it snaps. We love the broad being tied to the tracks as the train comes barreling at her. We love the couple being most at odds when they get together. It’s never easy for us and never over.

I guess you need to think of it from that perspective. The happy couple in daytime is dull. And dull is death or backburner. We want our shows front and center. So, strap in. It’s only the beginning of this story. And there will be many obstacles to come. There will be twists and turns and tests of faith and loyalty, but, as Viki said, it’s all about tuning in tomorrow to see what happens. And I know I will. 

Well, I’ll have wait a while. But I’ll be tuning in. I’d rather have an hour a week of fantastic than five hours of relish and Dieter and Kiki, the freak, and Silas the Dweeb. Remember, anything in a soap is worth waiting for. It's all about the process. Not the monkey.

Sorry, it's a compulsion.